Hey buddy, can I give you a dime? (note to self: does LinkedIn support tip jars? what would their cut be??)

If not a dime, would a small Starbucks coffee be better?

I want to learn more about what (and why) you do and I'm willing to pay for that privilege. If you negotiate hard, I'll make it a Venti and throw in a croissant😉

Does that sound hard? It is not and you can do it.

The knowledge gained from the conversation could be career changing.  AND there is a big difference between "can" and "do". 

The difference is all the friction or resistance (hat tip to Steven Pressfield) between you and the doing. That imaginaryfriction. Literally it only exists in your head.  The friction is only a missing skill (but probably one you didn't know existed). 

Being able to ask is a huge expander of careers because up or sideways or even out require asking. 

Can you ask for a raise? Can you ask to work in a different division? Can you ask around to find roles at other companies? Can you ask someone to share their wisdom so you can improve your life?

When you can ask - you have control in your career (and life). You can make things happen. You can achieve goals. 

A huge part of anxiety and depression and disengagement stems from feeling that you don't have control ("huge part" may even = 100%). 

How much better would work be if you knew you could find another job somewhere else? If you knew how to ask for a raise or a change to the product line? If you knew how to switch orgs? Yes, that is an empowering perspective. 

Mental wellness is a much bigger bucket than just breathing and mindfulness. Mental wellness includes the skill of asking - because asking is so fundamental to our ability as humans to operate in the world. Everything from VC funding to prom dates to book publishing and concert production requires asking. 

How have you thought about asking? How good do you think you are?

I'm curious as is everyone else, please can you share in the comments?

Thank you!